I started my jar this morning. I call it the “Gratitude and Wishes Jar”
I plan to write down one thing a day that I’m grateful for and all my hopes and dreams for this year.
This morning I realized… I have so much to be grateful for.
I have my health, my sanity, my family, my friends, my job which I love, a roof over my head, food in the fridge. I have a lot of qualities I don’t give myself enough credit for but I also have a bunch of beautiful people who are there to remind me. I have a lot! What more could I ask for? To be truthful, nothing. I want nothing more than to continue on this journey called life. To continue to walk with myself, to learn more, to grow more, to see more, to experience more, to love more, to breathe more. Another year of more of all this that I’ve been living.
For some reason, I have this notion that my life has been radically transformed during the past few years. As if the sum of my life experiences has somehow altered me on a genetic or biological level.
I find myself to be more kind, more loving, more generous, more intuitive, more patient, more graceful, more benevolent, more decisive, more confident, more honest, more trusting, more flexible, more peaceful, more joyous, more beautiful, more EVERYTHING than I’ve ever been in my life….
I posted this on Facebook today:
Some of you might not know this, but once upon a time I was a very shy person. I was afraid of sharing my thoughts and feelings with the world because I feared they could be rejected. I feared I could be rejected.. and in some way, by thinking that way I created that reality for myself. I was an outcast for a big part of my life. Today, not sharing my heart with others feels like drowning. Not letting them know how much I love them every second of every day is not an option. (some people are actually sick of it already haha) but I am so grateful for my bold, beating heart that feels so damn much for so many people. I am so grateful for this year because this is the year that I learned about courage, authenticity, loss, discovery, connection, transformation, detachment, freedom and most of all.. Love. To my friends and family, you beautiful people… thank you for being with me (near or far).. teaching me, pushing me, encouraging me, scolding me… loving me. Thank you so damn much 2015. I wish you all a 2016 full of love, love, love, some peace and joy too, and most of all… I look forward to the memories and experiences I hope to share with you. Happy New Year!
The response was somewhat overwhelming. I received messages from people I haven’t spoken to in years telling me how amazing and awesome I am, my primary school teacher even wrote to me saying she knew that shy side, but that I’ve always had a big and kind heart.
So maybe… I’ve always been this way? Maybe I’m now realizing it. Maybe this is what we call “Awakening”. Who knows? 🙂
They are a lot of things I’m not sure of. In fact, there are very few things I believe with 100% certainty. Full conviction. It is these 3 things:
I am a being of Love
Human beings have an immeasurable capacity for compassion, for kindness, for gratitude, for love! Love knows no boundaries, no barriers, no race, no gender, no color… when love comes knocking, open the door!
The stars, the trees, the leaves, the breeze, the sea, everything without is within me. I am connected to an Eternal Source of Unlimited Energy
I am here in this life to be happy. To experience love and beauty and truth and peace. In order to step into my own authenticity, in order to be me and claim my beautiful life, I need courage.
There is a flow to the entire Universe. There is order in the Chaos.
This is a post I wrote Jan 1, 2015:
Oh my god, is it really over? 2014, you were amazing on so many levels. You were a roller coaster ride the whole time and I’d like to emphasize that I survived. Thank you for pushing me past my limits, for testing new waters, for challenging… well pretty much everything. Thank you for bringing change, both temporary and permanent. Thank you for bringing opportunity. For bringing wisdom, joy, creativity, love and friendship. Thank you for reminding me of the value of family. I’m glad we do that every year. Thank you for my family of friends. Thank you for the books, the movies, the moments, the intimate conversations, the aleatory souls, the random chance encounters, the late nights, the early mornings, the sunsets, the meditations, the silence, those infinite moments where I took a deep breathe. Thank you for courage, for patience, for freedom, for truth. For everything, thank you. Sending my love to all my family and friends, may 2015 be a time of intense joy, fulfillment and togetherness. HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!
As you can see, there is some conducive string attaching 2014 to 2015 and I hope to 2016. I believe it is because I am aligned with my Truth more and more in time and therefore the path that I’m on automatically winds to fit where I am. I believe life is a beautiful and intrinsic dance and we all just need to let loose, take off our shoes and shake the hell out of it!
I wish every single one of you kindred spirits from the bottom of my heart a very wonderful and beautiful 2016. Full of LOVE! Peace, Happiness, Beauty, Growth, Transformation, Discovery, Re-Discovery, Encounters, Magic, Flores, Laughter, Eye gazing, hugs and absolute Bliss!
Thank you for being in my life. You are part of my journey, my existence, my growth, my transformation. This year, I hope to do the same for you.
With immense gratitude and love,